I’ve been MIA

I’m not sure anyone really cares, or if this post is even necessary for anything other than to make myself feel less guilty about pushing my hobby writing on the backburner. For those who follow this madness, you know I quit my career a while back to pursue this writing stuff – primarily freelance writing so that I can still pay my bills… because that kind of shit is important.

Despite the intentions of following my passion, I picked up this waitressing gig for extra cash and before I knew it I was meeting fascinating, awesome people. People who I never would have crossed paths with if I didn’t decide to give this writing thing a whirl. After the people, came the realization that I’d completely forgotten just how lucrative waiting tables can be.

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Me, after my first Friday night shift… via:giphy

Who the hell needs to freelance when I can socialize, have fun, and make bank?!

And that friends, is when the writing went back into hobby mode.

I started a book which has been re-titled about 3 times and is still in no shape to be read by the general public, bitched about Donald Trump politics, and shared my own, Me Too, story. I gave some solid tips on how to gain weight, and went a little nutty ranting about gym class.

I love writing. I love sitting here playing with words and allowing my thoughts to just fly out in any way I choose to direct them.

I’ve missed it.

It’s been over a month since I’ve posted anything new and I’ve barely even checked my stats…I don’t even know who I am anymore. So, this is where the story turns and I tell you that I’ve been freelancing for the last month and I’m kinda fangirling over it bit.

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Me, being proud of myself.

People are giving me real dollars to twist words around for them. Not that I’ve ever been someone who needs validation, but that’s some fucking validation. Not only do I write for these people…I’m editing. I get to play with other people’s words, and it’s almost as enjoyable as playing with my own.

I’m not going to make any false promises about posting and making time to write on Properly Ridiculous this time. I’ve done that in the past and then I just feel like a failure when it doesn’t happen – but failure isn’t in my vocabulary presently – because I’m an actual Freelance writer. Boom, I did it.

I’ll be ranting, raving, and storytelling as I have time…Imma go make some money.

PR Monday Memes: It’s Britney Bitch

First and foremost let me get one thing cleared up, I love Britney.

Team Britney since 2003… Um, Toxic? Ever heard of it? She’s a queen and when she had her meltdown, shaved her head and used an umbrella as a weapon of sorts, I still loved her.

I am not making fun of Brit, more embracing her realness (or something, I don’t know…I just love Britney Memes).


Everything is fine… I don’t know why people keep asking me that!

👴🏻

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Wow, that was quick…

Wish I could say I felt some shame relating to this….

Are you already convinced it’s hilarious or are you just not listening? 

The progression of a mom turning into 2007-Britney-Mom is real.

#spittake #mooooooom #britneymemes #mkultra #breakdown 💀👹

A post shared by Susan Hill (@suseyblue) on

Winning.

Me?? No, it couldn't be!! #britneymemes

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Not impressed. Stop talking. Life is hard.

Had enough of your shit Susan

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Actually, anything but that.

And that…

More often than I care to admit…

An oldie, but a goodie…

I totally get it. #britneyspears #britneymeme #meme #meltdown #lol

A post shared by $helbs 😻 (@shelbbygaaail) on

Because bad days are inevitable and we can all feel a little britney-breakdown at times…

#britneyspears #britney #britneymemes

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Happy Monday!

PRMondayMemes

Married White Female, Looking for a Healthy Debate

We are all living in a world that allows us to create our own skewed version of reality. Social media, every single day, throwing anything and everything that we already agree with in our faces and newsfeeds making us feel superior and right. How can I be wrong? I’ve been blasted by twenty-two articles in a span of ten minutes showing me that my opinions are basically a fact at this point.

I put myself into check sometimes with reminders that this also applies to me. It’s not easy to keep an open mind and truly listen to ideas that push against what has been smothering you since Facebook and other social media outlets started targeting their audiences with sponsored content. Your entire social media existence is warped, and that’s why we feel so strongly about issues – it’s being fed to us on a silver platter. Sure, it’s warped to your liking but that’s the problem.

Healthy debate is a treat nowadays. I have a hard time finding a person with opposing viewpoints to have a sensible conversation with; to explain, in a normal tone of voice, why they feel a certain way and then allowing me to do the same. Believe it or not, when I express myself, I enjoy a (respectful) contradictory remark. I cross my fingers and hope that this person hasn’t been bitten by the social media bug. That maybe, just maybe, a respectable, low-key exchange of opinions is possible.

The vast majority of humans who utilize social media would rather pump their fists and bang their chests, knowing that you won’t jump on their bandwagon. The opposing viewpoint does not matter, whoever says theirs the loudest wins – and they still hate each other.

We used to debate, we used to try to be open-minded to differing opinions. Not anymore, because we don’t even care enough to educate ourselves, let alone other people. It’s too easy. Fake news is real news, and real news doesn’t stand a chance. The speed at which information gets relayed to and from is faster than we, as a world, can keep up with… and that will be our demise.

It used to be a common conversation to imply that everyone is entitled to their own, without pure madness erupting. Suddenly, no one is listening. No one is interested as to why their neighbor voted the way they did, why they are choosing to not vaccinate their children, why they are for, or against gun reform. Instead of instantly judging, if we could take the time to just ask, why. 

We would be in such a better place if healthy debates were still a common occurrence. Whether you’re Republican, Democrat, Independent, white, black, Mexican, Catholic, atheist, young, old – this reality we live in affects us all in a range of different ways, but here we are.

Next time you’re in a position to have a real conversation with someone who doesn’t look at the world the same way you do, take it and embrace it. Listen to what is being said and respect that even if our ideas are polar opposites that we’re still human beings, coexisting.

PR Monday Memes: Let’s Get Political

Because…

And this is my life now…

😒😒😒

A post shared by The People for Bernie Sanders (@peopleforbernie) on

Thank you, Sanjana… you win.

is trump ok lmao ~n

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Justifications are usually pretty silly…

Hey Stranger…

LOL, call 'em!

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Still…

‘Merica and Jeebus!

Happy Sunday y’all #murrica #merica #jesus #sunfayfunday #lol

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One of those gosh darn rabbit holes.

Favorite one of the day…

Trump 2.0 is born😗 #WatchOutFakeNews ◂▸◂▸◂▸◂▸◂▸◂▸◂▸◂▸◂▸◂▸◂▸◂▸◂▸◂▸◂▸◂▸◂▸◂▸◂▸◂▸◂▸◂▸◂▸◂▸◂▸◂▸◂▸ 👉FOLLOW ME ❤️👇👇 @the_liberal_weenie @the_liberal_weenie @the_liberal_weenie 🔹Donald Trump 2️⃣🔴2️⃣🔵 🔹KEEPING AMERICA GREAT! 🇺🇸 #MyPresident #PresidentTrump #Trump #MAGA #Conservative #Memes #politicalmemes #America #USA #republican #trumpmemes #makeamericagreatagain #American #gunsdaily #trumptrain #AmericaFirst #2ndamendment #backtheblue #fakenews #democrat #military #patriot #alllivesmatter #president #AmericaFirst #libtards #liberallogic #DrainTheSwamp #AltLeft

A post shared by #1 Anti-Liberal Page🔹 (@the_liberal_weenie) on

So, if you’d like to discuss any of this further, $30/Hour is also my going rate.


PRMondayMemes

PR Random Rants: Gym Class

PRRandomRants

The only things I enjoyed in school was socializing and English…that’s it.

Actually, I also enjoyed the perfectly under-cooked Otis Spunkmeyer Chocolate Chip Cookies you could get…for breakfast, too. Clearly, I went to school before Michelle Obama started fighting childhood obesity.

Math and I? We hated each other, if there was ever a reason I shouldn’t have graduated, math would be the guilty party. How I never failed a single math class is honestly beyond me. To put it in perspective, I took my placement tests for college and was placed in a math class that focused on whole numbers and decimals… I would work my way up to fractions. 

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So, I went to beauty school to avoid it all together because fuck whole numbers.

There was only one class I dreaded more than math and that was gym. Uggghhhhh, I still hate it. I cringe when I look at my kid’s schedule and notice it’s gym day, and I don’t even have to participate.

As an adult – sure, I understand the reason it’s important for children to learn the value of movement, exercise, and team activities. I’m not saying that the class should be vetoed or anything, shit, I’m probably even in the minority of people who hated physical education.

I don’t care though, here goes my rant.

Gym class is one giant master plan to embarrass the living hell out of the unathletic and clumsy. Can we talk about the Presidential Standards For Physical Fitness Tests?

I never met any of the standards; I was below average for everything – push ups, sit ups…don’t get me started on the damn pull up bar. I’m still carrying a grudge for being forced to hang from the pull-up bar – even though I told them I can’t do any fucking pull-ups.

If someone put a gun to my head and forced me to choose a favorite portion of these tests, it’d be the sit and reach:  

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Fly myself forward as fast as I can in hopes that the force will be strong enough to keep that slidey thing moving after I fling backward.

How about the mile run? Some kids really pushed themselves but not me, I never ran a single mile at any point during my school years. Queen of the 27-minute mile, right here. Sometimes it was a sore ankle or the dreaded period cramps, but most of the time it was just a straight snotty protest.

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Can’t make me…

Floor hockey, soccer, football…basically any sport or activity that include things being kicked, thrown, or smacked in my direction was (and still is) bad news. If someone made the questionable choice to give me said object – my goal was always the same: get rid of it as quick as I can, no thought or effort involved.

If that means handing the football off to the opposing team because they happen to be closest – I’m just trying to survive!

Speaking of survival: Dodgeball. What I actually liked to call it is, “I-Hate-My-Life-Ball“.

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Am I the only one who gave eyes to the other weak girl on the opposing team? You get me out without injury and I’ll return the favor. Oh? My turn to enter the game again since someone caught a ball? I usually let other kids go in front of me until the teacher noticed and forced me back into the whirlwind of foam balls.

Hated it.

The rope climb? Why? Why is this important? This should only be mandatory for adults who would need to perform this for a job. Firefighter. Police Officer. Military. Body Builder. If a chubby seventh-grade girl can climb a hanging rope – she deserves extra credit. As if hanging from the pull-up bar wasn’t shameful enough…

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I tried really hard to think of some things about gym class that I didn’t hate and all I could come up with were those little 4-wheeled-scooters and the parachute; both of those were in elementary school before the fear of people’s opinions though – so they don’t count.

Rant over. 


Disclaimer: I know, I’m thirty-something and I’m still holding anger over this… maybe I should go back to therapy.