Please Don’t Watch Me Eat Ramen…

I have shared meals and delicious snacks with quite a few people in my 29 years. I have a mental list created of people I don’t enjoy eating with.

Them:   Hey..wanna grab lunch?

Me:   Um……. Ya know, I just ate – maybe coffee?

Is it acceptable to tell a grown adult to chew with their mouth closed? Were some people not taught this as children? It’s not the sight of it – I am very capable of looking away. It’s the revolting noise that is being made.  I grew up at a dinner table that my elbows were not allowed on – and if I was smacking my food a parental figure or one of my older siblings had something to say about it;  for that I am grateful.

It’s not only chewing with one’s mouth open that gets to me – taking an excessive bite is also a concern. Maybe it’s because I’m a dainty & classy lady (bahaha) – but I enjoy being able to taste my food.  People will shove such a large bite (that word seems small) making it nearly impossible to chew functionally because the food is essentially protruding past their lips trying to escape. Can they taste the food amidst trying to reel it in? It doesn’t look enjoyable for them (or me).

Talking with a mouth full of food? How about that…? I have been subjected to that on a number of occasions as I’m sure you have also. I wonder if people believe it will be less gross if they open their mouths & with their food-coated tongue, shove all the half chewed food over to one side of their cheek making it bulge. It doesn’t. It’s worse. It gives me the indication that more grossness is to follow.

Okay, so we have covered chewing with mouths open, monstrous bites, talking with food in one’s mouth – which leaves one thing that really aggregates me (& probably you).

Metal silverware makes a really dreadful noise when scratched carelessly on glass dishes. I know this, you know this – there are ways to prevent it & I wish more people took those measures.

Now…with all that being said…

I’m not perfect. I have some bad eating habits. I would prefer to be alone while I eat my Ramen for instance. It’s not pretty & I don’t pretend it is. It’s not food that I feel I want to spend a lot of time working on – So, I twirl as much as I feel I want to eat, shove it in my mouth and not so delicately chew off the remaining. That is why I prefer to be alone when I’m eating it. So no one has to watch & then go write a blog about how nasty watching people eat is – ‘cause I would expect it & wouldn’t be in the least bit offended.

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