Ray Rice: None Of Us Have Any Idea

Yesterday, I said Ray Rice was a terrible person. I may have jumped the gun.

Media is a silly thing. It’s so easy to get wrapped up and absorb all these opinions of other people & rapidly claim them as our own. I’m guilty. I’ve had a chance to talk to multiple people about it today, I’ve listened to some pod-casts – I’ve heard more than a handful of opinions.

He might be a terrible person…but, he might not. I don’t know & I’d be willing to bet you don’t know either. Janay Rice knows, Ray Rice knows, close friends, his family probably knows, her family may have their educated opinion…

Me & You…Not so much

I spoke to a guy today whose ex-girlfriend punched him in the face more than once, on a separate occasion she threw a large soda at his face while he was driving.  Once, she scratched his face…not how you’re thinking – I’m talking full blown start at the top of the both cheekbones & leave marks alllllll the way down. I know this guy, very well & that bitch was crazy.

(No…I am not saying Janay Rice is crazy – I have no idea…that’s my whole point.)

Why does any of that matter or change my opinion about Ray Rice?

I’d be willing to bet that at some point, this guy I know would have reached a breaking point. There would have come a day, if they stayed together… that he’d lose his marbles and there’d be potential of something awful like that happening. If he lost his marbles & punched that girl in the face… I wouldn’t think he’s a monster. Since I know him, it wouldn’t define his character. 

We don’t know what kind of relationship Janay Rice & Ray Rice have. They grew up together. She enrolled in Towson University in Maryland to be with Him after he was drafted into the NFL. They obviously have history…I’m sure some good, some bad, some great…some ugly…some nasty (obviously)… BUT WE DON’T KNOW.

What we witnessed – was terrible, inexcusable & disgusting. 

I just think a lot of people, myself included may have been out of place by saying that Ray Rice is a monster. 

Nobody knows… who’s to say this incident wouldn’t have been one of their deep dark secrets – and it happened to get caught on camera?  

No, that doesn’t make it okay…I’m just sayin’.

8 thoughts on “Ray Rice: None Of Us Have Any Idea

    1. Agree to disagree 🙂 I understand that this is not a popular stance to take on this issue – I’m not expecting to change anyone’s minds… Everyone is certainly entitled to their opinion. All I’m saying is that we do not know the demographics behind the situation. In my original post about Ray Rice, I mentioned that we did not even need this video to understand the caliber of what happened in that elevator – and so did the NFL – which is a whole different issue. This happened a long time ago. I’m not making excuses for him…I think that the 2 day suspension that was handed down was ridiculous…Because a looooong time ago – we knew he drug her body out of that elevator. He made a terrible decision…that is what we all know – but I do not think it defines who he is.


  1. I am a survivor of domestic violence. When I asked my husband why he would hit me in my face all the time when he would beat me, he said, “because if I hit you on your body I would kill you”. I was beaten because he didn’t like the way I cooked chicken, or when he would get drunk, he would always think I had been sleeping around. So I would get beaten for that. And yes I was afraid to leave him, tell my family, or his because I knew one day he would make me pay. Well I did escape from him and told my family, and they packed me up and little boy up. THERE IS NO EXCUSE FOR A MAN TO PUT HIS HAS ON A WOMAN. I know that same blow he gave her, mine was in a public park in the 80’s. Blood running down my face as I hit my head on a rock. I ran asking people to help me but no one would because he told them to stay out of it.
    He has since died. Died a very sad death at the age of 40. No I didn’t kill him but I had many dreams about it. I’m Just Saying!


    1. I am very sorry you had to experience that – I too am a survivor of domestic abuse.

      You are 100% correct when you say that there is no excuse – which is why I described the instance as Terrible, Disgusting & Inexcusable. The point that I am making here, is that we do not know their personal lives. You know yours, and I know mine…but my abuser and your abuser are not Ray Rice.

      Ray Rice may be just as bad as the man I had to get away from and yours…but there is also a chance he’s not a complete monster.
      He deserves punishment. He deserves consequence because what He did is disgusting.
      With that being said – this happened 5 months ago. We all knew (or the ones who follow sports) that he drug her body out of the elevator…We did not need to SEE the incident to know the caliber of the situation and yet now everyone wants his head on a platter.

      Janay is a victim in the situation and I have never said otherwise.

      My point is that, if my husband right now who is not abusive – got really drunk and did something like that…it would be terrible & inexcusable…it would be a very very bad decision, not who he is. It wouldn’t define him as a person. I would still love him. We’d move past it, with a hard road ahead…

      We don’t know the demographics behind this – everyone is so quick to judge because the tape is so shocking – it’s hard to not just hate him.

      I’m happy you got away from abuse & you’re here to tell about it and stand up for women.



Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s