One year ago I signed up for WordPress & published my first post 6 days later.
In this span of time, I’ve managed to convince 683 people to keep an eye on it. I watched that number go up and down quite a bit – depending on what was being ranted, raved or praised. I’ve monitored the traffic behind it all, almost to a fault.
I’ve watched my writing progress & change. I’ve explored different styles; wrote my very first fiction & followed with a few more. I attempted to make sense of crazy trials, news stories, missing planes, made my fear of Ebola known & told a whole-lotta people to STFU.
I struggled through my ridiculous anxiety, and learned how to curb it. Later in the year, listened to an audio book that rocked my socks off & told everyone to just go out and follow your own arrow. I Attempted to explain resting bitch face … In turn, I was kinda bitchy about smoking & littering.
I’ve documented my son growing up, his continuing crush on the Tooth Fairy … & when he tried to plunge the toilet with a towel. Yeah, It Happened. I’m so happy it’s written down & saved for his future girlfriends.
Since I’m obviously a professional, I shared the wealth of knowledge and told you how to raise your kids also.
I made my love for football well known. Wrote a few open letters to Jared Allen & Brett Favre. Stuck up for Adrian Peterson & Ray Rice, called out ignorant football fans & directly told the entire NFL to get it together.
Thank you, 683 people who validate my lack of a filter.
Yeah… what they said.
Listen to yourself. If you’re smart – you have the ability follow your own arrow – and screw everyone else that doesn’t bask in your greatness. If you’re not going to trust yourself, or you just simply can’t… why the hello should you trust anyone else?
This is not just coming out of nowhere; I read a book recently. (Actually, I didn’t read it at all – I listened to it.) The book is called, You Are A Badass by: Jen Sincero.
I didn’t only listen to it once…I listened multiple times – in one week.
If you have ever questioned yourself, your abilities or think you want more (more happiness – not stuff) out of life – read it. If you have never doubted yourself, your abilities & you think your life is perfect ………………….I still say, read it because I don’t see how Her words could possibly do anything other than positive things for anyone who does themselves the favor.
As I listened, I began to ask myself why. Why have been walking around this place for the last 29 years – trying to make everyone else happy? I’ve been so careful to sensor my words to accommodate other people. Always so careful not to make waves – and sometimes say no words at all. Always so careful to make sure everyone else is comfortable – while I sat and squirmed.
Could anyone see the visual going on in my brain of me ripping my hair out – while I smiled? I let my own happiness get away & the most unacceptable thing about it, was being content with it; the falseness felt embarrassingly normal. Allowing people to dictate mere words that escape my mouth & ultimately my own direction is a thing of the past.
Fuck It…… and I don’t care if that offended anyone.
Positive visualization, positive thinking…karma…good ju-ju…Whatever you chose to call it – it’s real and it surrounds each and every one of us. It can either be an awesome, fabulous hug… or it’s going to strangle you. If you’d rather have a hug, than a tight grip around your neck……….start thinking as if you know it’s all going to be okay. Once you start thinking it – you need to start doing it. After you start doing it… the goodness just starts rolling in.
If you’d rather sit and dwell on bad things – you do that…
I’ll be over here – not stressing out.
What other people do and say (or don’t say) is out of your control. Your kid just threw their juice & it’s going to a bitch to clean up? Nothing you can do about it. What’s done is done. If you can’t control it – it shouldn’t control you…end of story. You get to live one time – that’s it. Once. You don’t get tomorrow back, today – or an hour ago. If there’s a problem – fix it. If you have a problem with someone – tell them.
As Kasey Musgraves so eloquently says…
Jen says in the book <yes-we are on a first name basis> something about… even if you’re behind on your mortgage, you have been stressing out about your avoidance of the dirty bathrooms for 2 weeks…you haven’t spoken to your mother in 6 years – right now at this very second, you can enjoy the moment you’re in right now. The things you’re stressing about cannot stop you from being happy in your present.
We as a society are walking around like a herd of cattle buying what the advertisers tell us to buy (quick, before someone you know gets it first!), saying what we think others want to hear (to make them happy) & doing things that we don’t even want to do simply to appease other people – people who could care less more often than not.
Sit and really think about that……It’s crazy.
Be You. Do You. Own it.
Own your decisions.
Own your ideas.
Own your passions.
Own your opinions.
Own your words.
You’re pretty awesome…start believing it.
Jen Sincero has spoken to me & it’s changed the way my brain wraps around my thoughts.. (Not personally…just while she was narrating the awesome book she wrote.) In my present, my thoughts hold so much value…because I am listening to me.
Give it a shot. (& read – or listen to her book).